- gabrielgabrielgabriel! - Monday, September 15, 2008 Lately, i've been feeling like everything is out of my control. The second I have my grasp on something, another random obstacle comes up in its place. Being a mom takes an extreme amount of time from everything else. All I want to do is take care of him anyway even though I know I have other obligations. My weekly schedule since school began was crazy at first but im slowly getting into a routine that everyone is able to live with. -Mondays I am in school from 10-4:30, my hubby picks me up and drives me to the bus stop to go into brooklyn, he can't take me all the wya because he has class as well. I rush home, take over from my mom give her a break from watching gabriel all day and do my usual refill bottles and play with gabriel. My hubby Arnel gets home around 8:30 and I get the nighttime bottles ready in an thermobag with ice pack, bring up the bottle warmer and gabriels pillow from the downstairs bassinet and go up to bed. -Tuesday I have off so when gabriel wakes up which is sometime around 5:30-6 am, I would feed him and put him in my baby bjorn carrier to start chores. I clean up the house and do all the laundry from the weekend, give gabriel a bath, hopefully take a nap, do some school work if I have, help with dinner so that when Arnel comes home from work he has a hot meal, then the usual nightly chore for gabriel. -I wake up on Wednesday around 6ish bring gabriel to my mom and get ready for my long day in school from 10 am to 10 pm. When I get out of class I wait for Arnel around 10:50 and we get home around 11:20. I eat quickly, shower, change, get gabriels nightly things ready and head off to bed. -Thursday I wake up around 6, I try to lay in bed as long as gabriel allows, get my things ready to go to Arnel's moms house. Arnels mom picks me up around 4 takes me to 86th street so I can take the bus to go to school from 6-10. She takes Gabriel for the evening until Arnel and I get back around 10:30. Get the nightly things ready and sleep. -Fridays im off so I get to be with gabriel all day, but usually around this time I am so tired I just want to sleep. I try so hard to stay up. When it's days that Gabriel is cranky and wants to be up early it's especially hard. Sat and Sun Arnel's mom watches gabriel while I get all my hw done and rest for a bit, sun evening I go back to my house to start the week again. Arnel and I are so close to finishing school, Arnel's classes are mostly at night because he has work from 7am-4pm and my job is school and gabriel. Sometimes I would get assignments from school that are required for a certain day so if I dont get it done on the weekend my whole week is a mess. If I dont get to clean the house or do laundry I feel incomplete and a mess. All I would like to do is just relax and have some tasha time but its gotten to a point where I would be happy if i got half an hour more sleep. Sometimes gabriel sleeps thru the whole night sometimes he's up at around 4 just wanting to chat going googoo and gaagaa, while I respond, with Really? wow! What else Gabriel!?" Arnel wakes up and looks at me like i'm insane talking to myself in the middle of the night. This feeling of being out of control is just not being able to get through the week the way I want to. The way that is expected of me. My cousins tell me I'm doing alot and its expected for me to feel this way, but, I am even forgetting things. My sentences get cut off midthought, and I am feeling like a complete idiot beacuse my mind is extra slow. I've gotten use to the lack of sleep and when I get at least 5 hours I feel good for the day lately. When I had more time I used to sleep for over 10 hours. hah what a time. I wouldn't trade it, I dont regret gabriel AT ALL. I feel extremely blessed to have him in my life he is such a cute and good baby, I love him too much. Just like my daily routine my words are even overcomed with talk about gabriel and I can't be any happier.

posted by Tasha~nyah @ 1:50 PM 0 Comments: Post a Comment << Home